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I'm devastated!!

I am battling to come to terms with going through this next phase of my life.

A few weeks ago I felt terrible: aching joints, tired, feverish, loss of appetite, etc. As I have always been very healthy I initially thought that I had picked up a flu virus or maybe even Malaria (due to my travelling into Africa).

I went to see my doctor who did all sorts of tests and suggested that I may be menopausal. When the results of the tests came back I was devastated. I know that I am 47 and this is the time for most women to start / go through Change of Life, but I look younger than I am and I definitely do not see myself as old. I know that one doesn't have to be old to be Menopausal, but that is my emotional response. Plus in my opinion, my symptoms were not menopausal. I had a hysterectomy a few years ago (due to endometriosis, which also resulted in infertility). Five years prior to my hysterectomy I lost one ovary, but my remaining ovary has been functioning correctly (up till now).

I always knew that this day was coming but could not believe how just how devastated I was when I received the results of my hormonal blood test. I am slowly coming to terms with this and have made an appointment with my gynaecologist to find out 'where to from here?'.

The reason for sharing this story is emotional. I am battling to come to terms with going through this next phase of my life, so much so that I have only recently told my husband what the doctor said. I have not yet been able to bring myself to discuss this with my mother whom I seem to remember went through her menopause at about the age of 50.

I have also only experienced a few of the 35 symptoms, but knowing that not everyone experiences all the symptoms is useful. My periods of being hot have lasted for longer than an hour so couldn't be considered a flash which is part of my denial process.

Thank you very much for sharing your stories, I found them comforting and it has helped me to come to a better understanding and acceptance of this new phase of my life.



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Updated  05/15/2010